Sick Day

I had a mental health day yesterday, and a lot of extra time to catch up on errands, which really meant a lot of time to SHOP!

Back in the US, this would have meant hours of browsing through the racks at Target, and Borders, and Jo-Ann's, etc... until I had either emptied my wallet or ran out of time or both. Then, a few days later, I'd regret all the shopping, because now I had more stuff than I needed and less money than I wanted. *sigh*

But guess what??!! Even with a whole day at my disposal, and plenty of excuses to shop at Costco and the Mall (and online), I only got the things on my list! I wasn't even tempted to wander through aisles of things that I don't need.
After 3 months living out of suitcases, and 6 months of not finding the sizes or styles or items I want, I've kind of given up. I didn't really need anything new. I wear about the same 10 outfits over and over. Our house looks great, without lots of added knick-knacks. We can't carry home heavy gifts for friends and family. I've borrowed print and audio books from the library, and I can't find any in English here anyway.

I hope that 18 more months here can officially wean my shopping addiction, and it's not just a passing phase. :)

traffic jam - lessons learned

Today I was stuck in traffic. As in, a 45-minute drive took 2.5 hours. I was really frustrated.

In the US, a huge traffic jam would cause serious road rage. Americans would be honking their horns, walking around screaming, throwing our fists in the air, calling the radio stations, demanding the firing of our governor or the police chief, and in general letting it ruin our day. But in Mexico, people were smiling and laughing, flirting with people in the cars next to them, listening to Mariachi music, and generally enjoying being late to work. :)

Kind of gives some perspective, doesn't it?

The Shack

Ok, if you haven't read "The Shack" by William Young, you need to read it. ASAP.

This highly controversial novel tells the story of a man consumed by grief and anger directed towards God after the brutal murder of his young daughter. Like most of us, he wonders why God allows evil to happen and why it seems like evil people cause good people so much grief. He wants God to offer grace and forgivness through Christ to good people, like his wife and kids, but not to bad people, like murderers. He can only start to understand God by developing a relationship with him. This book is the story of that relationship.

I wouldn't read this book instead of going to church or reading the bible, but it has a lot of great truths and interesting insights. I laughed, I cried, I can't stop thinking about it.

I think I'll read it again.

Looking Back

It’s been almost two years since Dave first mentioned to me that we could move to Mexico. That’s how he told me – we could. Not that we will or we should or we might. We could. We could move if: if we both agreed that that’s where God was leading us. We could.

So we thought and prayed and planned and hoped for almost 18 months before the move happened. By that point we were as ready as we could be.

I don’t know how other people present this opportunity to their wives or husbands, but I’m guessing not as well as David did. Because either the wives say, “absolutely not!” and they never come, or the wives say, “whatever you think, sweetie” and then come but they’re miserable, or the wives say, “great! I wanted a few years vacation from my real life.” Almost no one says what we said: “we both are moving and we both are working because this marriage is a partnership and no one wins when someone loses.”

So now, when someone has a bad day at work or when everything seems to be going wrong, or when homesickness settles in for a few days – in other words, when life isn’t perfect – there’s no one to blame. There’s no fighting. No one’s mad. We made this choice together and we’re living it together.

I don’t know of any other way to live peacefully.

Shopping Malls in Mexico

For the last 5 centuries, Mexican cities have been modeled after Spanish cities: with a central plaza consisting of an open area, normally with a park or benches or something surrounded by the most important buildings in the city - the cathedral, bank, government offices, and sometimes a rich person's house or a museum. The plaza would be like the spoke of a wheel with roads veering off in multiple directions from this plaza. In very large cities, smaller plazas throughout would be in the centers of specific neighborhoods, and house smaller churches, government buildings, etc.
Hanging out in the plaza is an important activity for Spaniards and Mexicans. In warmer climates, it's very important to mingle outside (this is very different than how northern Europeans and midwestern Americans have traditionally met with friends). So everyone would "grab the old ladies and pack up the babies" and walk throughout the plaza - where kids will play ball and old guys play checkers and couples smooch and ladies gossip and families buy ice cream, etc.
In modern Mexico, Shopping Malls are becoming the plazas of the middle and upper classes. In these places, they can do all the mingling they used to do in the plazas, but without inclement weather and beggars and such.
(I hear Wal-Mart is becoming the plazas of the lower and working classes, but I'm not sure.)
On Sunday we went to the mall near our house, which is more "American" than our US malls! It has a 2 food courts, movie theatre, ice rink, 2 coffee houses, bowling alley, casino, salons, snack bars, cell phone kiosks, very clean bathrooms, and a LOT of stores.
But unlike US malls, which are full of tweens and teens and bored husbands and housewives, this mall was hopping! Dads were carrying babies in snuglis and pushing them in strollers. Old ladies were snacking on ice cream cones and watching their grandkids ice skate. Couples were going out to a movie and then out to dinner. Entire families (sometimes 3 generations) were relaxing together, enjoying their Sunday afternoon.
Watching them did make me a little homesick for our own families. But mainly I was surprised at how much a mall shows about a culture.
In the US, malls are all about the shopping.
In Mexico, malls are all about the relationships.
Kinda made me wonder.

Overheard on Cultural Day

Friday we had a special cultural day celebration at school. Oct. 12 is Columbus Day/ Native Americans Day/ Day of the Race in the Americas and Foundation Day in Korea. So we spent a half day celebrating various cultures. Here are some of the comments heard:
"Whoo-hoo!" (upon seeing their own country's flag)
"Jesus Loves Me" (in 6 languages)
"I had no idea..." (followed by a number of statements)

In my class, students looked at groups of unidentified pictures from a variety of American sub-cultures.
"OHMYGOSH! IT'S TERRORISTS!" (upon seeing muslims in Dearborn, MI)
"that looks so gross"/ "that looks delicious" (a picture of 'soul food' from Detroit)
"wait, I know this place! It's the TajMajal!" (it was a picture of a mosque in Dearborn)
"This has got to be disney world. No one really lives like this." (it was a picture of Frankenmuth, MI)
"Ms. Kelly, where's that place kinda by Denmark?" "Scandenavia?" "Yep, that's it! This is the scandenavian flag" (It was a polish flag, on a parade in Chicago)
"is that sarah palin?" (it was an eskimo family in Alaska)
"these are fortune cookies" "did you even read this, dummy? it says 'moon cakes'" "but there's a pieces of paper coming out of them!" (it was a fortune cookie)
"this must be africa. everyone's black" (it was detroit, MI)
"this is japan - that's where they wear kimonos" "no way! they have fortune cookies, definitely china" "wait - you're asian, what do you think?" (it was chinatown, san francisco)

After a half day of fun activities, we had a potluck lunch with every family bringing something to share. I was getting homemade hummus and pita bread triangles ready when the kids circled around.
"what is that?" "is it cheese"
"no, it's hummus"
"what?"
"hummus"
"what?"
"hummus. it's ground chickpeas. it's like a dip"
"is it spicy?"
"nope. they feed it to babies."
"who does?"
"it's arabic. Remember how I said that a lot of Arabs live near my house in MI? They eat this a lot, and so all of us like to eat it, too."
"where did you find it in Mexico?"
"my husband made it from scratch."
"what's that?"
"it's pita bread. in Mexico they call it pan arabe or arabic bread. it's like the bread Jesus ate."
"really?"
"yep. try a little! I bet you'll like it!"
"wow! this is really good!"

Everyone ate hummus and pita bread and absolutely loved it. Even Mr. Derek, who said, "I really liked your hammas." I wanted to point out that I did not bring a terrorist group from Lebanon, but I thought he'd miss the joke.

Overall, a really great day. :)

princess life part two

It's always wierd to travel, bc it's so surreal. Nothing seems normal, and if you let yourself, you can forget about all of the negativity at home. And when homesickness hits hard, it's easy to forget any negatives of home, bc all the positives come swirling into your mind.

Had we traveled abroad in a less advanced time, we likely would have no idea what was happening back "home" in the US in general and in Michigan in particular. But we do know. We have high speed internet and English-language TV and phones. We know. We know that GM & Chrysler stock are freefalling, and that people are losing their homes, and that raucous election crowds are shouting insults. We know that it's a crazy time to be an American, but we can't help it.
We're still proud to be from the USA.

Only, the issues back home make it all the more surreal that anyone would choose to live here merely to take a "time-out" from their "real" lives. How can someone sit here, with live-in help, a few credit cards, and no responsibilities knowing that thousands, maybe millions, of Americans would like a job, any job? argh.

Living the Life of a Princess

My Spanish tutor is awesome. She's a mature lady (NOT old!) with grown kids, who's been living in Toluca and teaching Americans like me & Dave for years now. She's not only really patient, but makes learning really fun, while keeping really high standards for our learning.

My favorite classes are when we get off on a tangent and can just talk in Spanish for an hour or so. This gives me great practice, but also great insights into the educated Mexican mind.
Last night was one of those nights. :)

I found out that Dave & I are one of the youngest couples she's ever worked with in this capacity. She was really surprised that a 27-year old could have the kind of responsibilities that Dave has. But once she met us, she was also really surprised at how much we embraced our lives here in Mexico. Aparantly, it's relatively normal for the US executives she works with froma number of companies - to basically come down knowing no spanish and not really trying to learn any. Dave is one of the more advanced students she's had, and she says he's really improving.
Also, I'm only the 2nd wife she's EVER worked with who's actually learned spanish. Most of the wives either don't take classes at all. If they do, they don't do any homework, they only come to class once a week for an hour or so, and they don't really try to use Spanish outside their limited time with Sara.

Well, that got me going. "I shouldn't say anything..." I started, but since it's her job to listen to me speak Spanish, she gave me the go ahead :) "Why do they come?" I asked. "Why do they come to a country where they don't know the language or culture, and they don't want to learn, and they don't have a job or anything to do all day?"

"They want to live like a princess." Sara said.

I had never thought it out; never put it into words. But that's exactly what they want. For a few short years, these women want to be on a constant vacation. They have nannies and maids and drivers and money. They have no responsibilities, no concerns. Their husbands work, their employees work, their children play, and they relax. They go to the gym and the beauty parlor and the mall and the coffee shop. They watch TV all day and take long baths once the kids are in bed. They write home bragging to their friends and family about their new wonderful life.

But what about when it's over? At some point, these women have to go home! Someday, they'll need to clean a toilet and make dinner and get up early and drive the kids to school. Someday, they'll have to sit through an interview explaining what they did for 2 or 3 or 5 years while they were in Mexico. And they won't even be able to say "I learned Spanish." or "I volunteered."

I couldn't do that, I told her. I will not believe that the 2 years we're here is merely a pause from my real life. I cannot wake up every morning knowing that yesterday, today, and tomorrow don't really count for anything. I can't talk with my family and friends when I have nothing to talk about. I won't return to the United States with nothing to show for the time I've been here.

Every day is a gift. I'm too young, and life's too short to throw away even one day.

So what do I want from this experience? Everyone I know expects me to come home on every vacation, and ultimately when we move back, with a story to tell. An explanation.

When I return, I want to say that I know Spanish. Not that I taught it, or studied it, or speak it a little. I know it. I can use it.
When I return, I want to say that I saw Mexico. I want to travel to as many cities as possible and see as much of the country as possible.
When I return, I want to say that I grew in my career. I want to learn how to run a library, how to teach a subject I know nothing about.
When I return, I want to say that I helped Mexico. I want to donate my time, and my money, and my skills to make this a better place.
When I return, I want to say that I grew Spiritually. I want to rely on God more fully than before. I want to trust Him, no matter where He sends me.
There's a lot of other silly things, too. I want to write a book or two, and catch up on scrapbooking, and learn to play the piano (again). I want to read a lot, and make new friends, and learn new recipies. I want to spend time with my husband and lead mission trips and visit with my nieces & nephews.

In other words, I want to keep living.
Live each day as if it were on purpose.

DF Costco

We spent the whole day in DF today: church, park, lunch, shopping. It's a long day, but worth it.
We went to Costco in DF - what a mess! There were literally more cars than spaces there. Sometimes I forget that Mexico City is the largest city on earth! But whenever I realize that, I'm so glad we don't actually live there. Craziness reigns!
But we did get ground turkey, a space heater, and organic fabric softener. Sometimes it pays to be so close to an urban metropolis. :)

Warning - Frio!

No joke, this morning the radio had a warning that went something like this: "parents, bundle up your kids! It's freezing out there, and you don't want them to get pneumonia!"
It was like mid-40s (F) this morning. It'll get up to mid 60s(F) this afternoon.
Seriously?

Turns out, that it normally doesn't get this cold until December, so they're all convinced that Global Warming actually means GLobal Cooling for Mexico.

I'm just thankful I the truck is here - and that I thought to pack some sweaters.